Nickname The Phillie: Jayson Werth

Posted by Tim Malcolm, Mon, July 07, 2008 03:30 PM | Comments: 112
Moniker, Posts

The Phillies have some fantastic nicknames. There’s The Bat (Pat Burrell), Hollywood (Cole Hamels), Lights Out (Brad Lidge), Chooch (Carlos Ruiz) and of course, the Flyin’ Hawaiian (Shane Victorino). But not everyone has a nickname, and we need to help.

An off-hand conversation about Chad Durbin brought upon the nickname “Dim the Lights,” which I think is a worthy moniker for the man. That’s why I think we here at the Nation need to do more of the same. This week I’m opening a feature called “Nickname the Phillie,” where you guys can determine the nickname of select Phils.

First I’m offering Jayson Werth. His two-run home run with two strikes and two outs in the ninth was one of his biggest Phillie highlights. His three-homer game earlier this season was another. A guy with his substantial power, speed, defensive abilities and patience at the plate deserves a great nickname. Go at it — nickname the Phillie.

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About Tim Malcolm

Tim Malcolm has written 1947 articles on Phillies Nation.

  • Posts: 0 Ben

    “The Giraffe” – just watch him run down the first base line and then watch a giraffe run

  • Posts: 0 fred

    ”High net worth” is brilliant, Mike.T

  • Posts: 0 TJ

    Come to think of it, I thought that it was Edge because they looked similar and he seemed to give teams that Edge.

  • Posts: 1650 Tim Malcolm

    Avatar of Tim Malcolm

    High-Net is definitely a Berman nickname. Jay Bird is a nice one, especially as his frame resembles Big Bird.

    We got The Patient, Speed Stick, High-Net and Jay Bird as finalists, IMO. We’ll decide on the winner next week, and if another real good one comes out we’ll include it.

  • Posts: 0 Lewisauce

    Lightning Rod. Speed Stick. The Craftsman. On Call. On Demand.

    They all sound like (gay) porn star names.

    The only two I like are Jawa and Johnny Wacko. (But I’m weird.)

  • Posts: 0 Larry

    Jayson “For What Its” Werth

    From the movie, the “Natural”, Joe Don Baker played a guy called the “Whammer” That could be applicable.

  • Posts: 0 That Guy

    How about “Vagina Chin”.

  • Posts: 0 Bloodbath McGrath

    I love Jayson “For What It’s” Werth, but it really could only be used with his full name. Regardless, that’s my favorite.

  • Posts: 0 That Guy

    How about”shit the bed”

  • Posts: 0 Julie

    I’m surprised nothing has been mentioned about his hot mom…

  • Posts: 0 Brian

    It’d be a lot easier if he sucked, wouldn’t it? I’ve been calling him Weird Beard but Chinny Chin Chin might work too – he’s definitely blown down some houses.

  • Posts: 0 Lewisauce

    I was trying to come up with something referring to his hot mom, but all those nicknames just sounded gross.

    “The Whammer” is pretty good.

    Now that I’m thinking about it, “Hot Mom” isn’t bad either. Sure, he’s not a mom himself, but we’d all know who is being referred to.

  • Posts: 0 Don M

    MILF oldie but goody

  • Posts: 0 LarryStevenJeltz

    “Dorsal Mohawk”. It was worse at the beginning of the year when it went all the way down his next, but he still looks like he belongs in adult entertainment.

  • Posts: 0 Bryers

    Since he already has a nickname, JDub (the Dub for W), isn’t all this senseless banter!

  • Posts: 0 Don M

    So Taguchi = “The Thief” … or … “Crook” for stealing money this year

  • Posts: 0 Justin Evans

    Yeah, I was just going to say his nickname has been J-Dub for awhile.

    How about “Werthless Against RHP”?

    I kid, I kid.

  • Posts: 0 Butthead


  • Posts: 0 Phlorida

    money’s werth

  • Posts: 0 Shannon

    Mc Worthy

  • Posts: 0 Sean


  • Posts: 0 Lisa

    Count on Werth
    Count Werth
    Jay Count

    He’s at his best when its full count

  • Posts: 0 Kimmy

    how about we all just yell “we’re not werthy” when he’s on the field/at bat………sounds about right. the kid’s fantastic. and he can look like a porn star all he wants. i wouldn’t say no!

  • Posts: 0 Jh

    “johnny reb” because of his civil war mustache.

  • Posts: 0 Becky

    Well his 2-run homer with 2 strikes and 2 outs…how bout ‘Deuce’

  • Posts: 0 werth sucks

    tell him to shave his soul patch…if he played at a real ball park, he’d only have 9 hr.

  • Posts: 0 Phil

    That’s nice Werth Sucks. I’m sure you’re a Mets fan. Before running your mouth you should look at his home/away splits for homers. 13 away 11 on the road. Werth also crushes the ball and hits opposite field bombs. He has a lot more power than you think. Did you see the 400+ foot blast he hit in game 4? Probably not.

  • Posts: 0 Phil

    I mean 13 away 11 at home*

  • Posts: 0 Bill Prinz


  • Posts: 0 your mom

    Jayson “The Big, Bad” Werth cause I think he looks like a wolf…

  • Posts: 0 Mike

    Star Fox. he looks just like him

  • Posts: 0 your mom

    He does look like Star Fox… but I don’t think Star Fox woulda booted that ball in right OR got double up at 1st HA

  • Posts: 0 I'm werthy

    I still like J-Dub or J-Bird. Doesn’t matter I just call him “sweet”!

  • Posts: 0 JJ

    I am gonna call him Baberaham Lincoln because he is a total babe and Werth every penny.

  • Posts: 0 WerthIt

    I’ve called him Scruffy Puppy all season, esp. on the road when he doesn’t seem to pack a rezor.
    Big Bad Werth gets my other vote.

  • Posts: 0 PatG

    I like “NetWerth” and “Scruffy Puppy” I was at the parade and saw him close up. He is VERY sexy.

  • Posts: 0 Isabelle

    I like lightning rod!

  • Posts: 0 M.

    i dont know if you guys are still looking for a nickname for jayson but i think he’s the hottest one on the team he’s my #1 pick but i love the nickname thunder cause everytime he hits that ball you can hear and feel the thunder of it jayson “thunder” werth

    but i muct say i did like stinger too

  • Posts: 0 Kar

    Jason”Worth It” Werth because he is so worth watching!!!

  • Posts: 0 Sam

    what about “sexilicious man candy”
    that one is quite nice:)

  • Posts: 0 Plays hard

    Jay Bird, JaWa, and Johnny Wacko are amongst my favorites.

    I also am a fan of Lincoln

  • Posts: 0 Mike

    I think Jay-bird is a standard nickname for any “J” name. It’s catchy, but not very distinctive.

    “Werthington” I like. It’s kind of classy, yet funky.

  • Posts: 0 Christina

    Werewolf. haha me and my friend call him the sexy wolf

  • Posts: 0 Tonyb says

    Let’s call him “The Stealer”.

  • Posts: 0 Leslie

    If you watch Jason, he always puffs his cheeks out during a critical play or when he hits…I say we nickname him Jason “Cheeks” Werth

  • Posts: 0 Veronica

    I alway’s caused him the “Sexecutioner”

  • Posts: 0 Veronica

    I always called him the “Sexecutioner”

  • Posts: 0 James

    I say he should be Jayson “Fifth Deck ” Werth

  • Posts: 0 Kaitlyn

    I think Jason “Greased Lightning” Werth works.

  • Posts: 0 Bobbi

    I like Jayson “The Spark” Werth, which is what he brings to the game.

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